marty21

John

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 14:41:26 GMT

He was given a good send off, and I think he would have enjoyed the drunken wake.

uncle Pat

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 14:40:16 GMT

It's frustrating, all the indicators seem to suggest that Pat died but can't quite prove it, it's circumstantial at the moment. Should be getting more info next week, hopefully it will prove it either way.

uncle Pat

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 14:10:01 GMT

we are closer to finding out whether or not Pat has died, should know later today, a bit of information my cousin is tracking down to tie in with what we know about the Pat who died. I still have the feeling that Pat is dead, but would like to know for sure before we tell the rest of the family.

uncle Pat

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 18:12:22 GMT

I've been trying to contact Uncle Pat to tell him of John's death. Pat disappears for years on end, but usually someone knows a pub he drinks in, so we get a message to him. This time we're not sure, so we contacted the pension people who said he hadn't claimed a pension (he's 71) I checked death records, and found his name, with the same date of birth (but one year out on year) I have a feeling that it is him. Still have to check some more, but a cousin of mine found out that he was living in Lambeth 6 years ago, and the death was registered in Lambeth...

Uncle John RIP

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Thu, 28 May 2009 17:54:01 GMT

On Monday my Uncle John died, he was about 62, and had been ill for some time. He was one of my dad's younger brothers so my dad is understandably upset. John was a heavy drinker, a real heavy drinker, he'd disappear for months on end, was was basically a street drinker for years.I didn't meet him that much over the years, even though he lived in Bristol for a long time, and I was in Bath. He'd turn up, get into a fight with dad, and disappear. He surfaced for a funeral about 10 years ago of his sister, my auntie Bridget. Ultimately the drink took his toll, after years of heavy drinking, he was admitted to a care home, suffering from dementia. It was a sad end to a life that promised a lot from what I have been told. He was the brightest of my dad's family, they thought he might end up going to either university or entering the priesthood. My Dad is one of 14 kids. He started drinking early, not fantastically early, 15 or so, but soon gave up on dreams of education, he would have been the first of the family to attend University had he gone (I think that honour went to me in the end, about 20 years later) he gave up on the priesthood, and headed for England. A well worn path followed by elder siblings, to Birmingham, where my Aunty Bridget had settled, she was the eldest in the family, a 2nd mother to her siblings who followed her to Birmingham, and then spread out, to London and the West Country. Initially he held down labouring jobs through the family, and the drinking continued, he moved down to Bristol where 3 of his brothers lived, and then the cycle started, working, drinking, not working, drinking, not caring, working, drinking, etc etc. I remember him as a clever man, witty, and great to talk to, unless he was shitfaced, when he could be very annoying to be fair. They say drinking is an Irish disease, it has claimed another victim.

My dad and another brother (TJ) are driving down to Devon today to register the death, and to claim the body and make the funeral arrangements. I'll go down for the funeral and the wake (which John would have loved) John's brother Liam, was closest in age to him, he would have just been to the Wedding reception of his oldest son Oliver (which I am also going to) a happy occasion, followed by a sad one.

Rest in Peace John Togher, I hope you find peace, finally.

20 years

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 09:24:03 GMT

Forgot to mention yesterday when i was a little animated about the poison pensioner, that yesterday was the 20th Anniversary of my arrival in London. Yes, little marty21 (aged 23) got on a train in Bath and came to London, well Buckhurst Hill where my mate was staying. Lost count of the number of jobs I've had in London, I could count them if I could be arsed, ok just got arsed, 11 jobs. I made my way to Clapton via Buckhurst Hill, Acton (although it might be Ealing) Southfields, Temple Fortune, Stoke Newington, London Fields, Stoke Newington (again) and finally sunny Clapton.

being savaged by a poison penned pensioner

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 21:06:13 GMT

I work for a housing co-op, been there 6 months, it's dull and not as worthy as I thought. Last week a tenant contacted me to tell me he had received a copy of a letter by mistake, and it mentioned me. Of course I was very curious and raced around to see him, the letter was basically addressed to the management committee, tenants who run the co-op, I basically have 12 bosses.

The committee member wasn't able to make a meeting to discuss my probation, so had written to other members with her thoughts, and mistakenly posted a copy to this tenant. She basically wanted to extend my probation due to my apparent "lack of attention to detail" and an "appalling letter I had sent to all members of the committee. Now attention to details is probably true, I don't make mistakes, but may misspell a name every now and again. The appalling letter was basically not a letter, more a briefing note about a decision reached by the committee, sent to everyone, it didn't have a "dear" or a "yours sincerely" in it, just a few paragraphs, a summary.

I wasn't particularly surprised about the author, she has always given me the impression that she doesn't like me, not another colleague, who has had run-ins with her for years. My predecessor left because of this poison penned pensioner.

I stewed on it over the weekend, came back to the office, the Chair arrived, seemed aware that I had seen it (no idea how, I hadn't actually told anyone) she said she was sorry that I had seen it, but that some of the criticisms were correct, although accepted that the "appalling letter" wasn't actually a letter. I said I wanted to meet the poison penned pensioner, she said she would ask her, she did, the poison penned pensioner didn't think it was "appropriate" to meet. I heard that she had visited members of the committee on some sort of campaign to convince people that she was correct. Quite happy to write letters and have meetings behind my back, not that happy to speak to me directly.

Anyways, they are meeting on Wednesday to discuss this. They will be in no doubt that I am pissed off with poison penned pensioner, and I will hear their decision.

Could be back on the temp market soon, I won't beg for a job.

more sales

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Sun, 01 Mar 2009 23:31:51 GMT

well one more, to a bloke who is a tenant of the co-op I work for, he gave me a fiver for it, I was going to give it to him for nothing, crap salesman that I am. An old friend from America asked about it, I sent it to her free of charge, in a credit crunch/recession as well!

scabby arm is much improved, although i still pick at it, stopping it from going completely, will post more scabby arm updates soon!

arm improved

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 11:48:28 GMT

My arm is less scabby, the cream from the chemist seems to have had a beneficial effect. Still can't help picking at the scabs though, did that as a kid, and haven't quite grown out of it.

my book is for sale again on Amazon, and sales are "brisk", 2 copies in 2 weeks!

back again

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 00:50:06 GMT

Been a while, all sorts of IRL stuff happening, still happening, quite stressful to be honest. I have a rash on my arm which could be connected, it is pretty yukky, and I scratch it at night, which doesn't help. I did finally get around to getting some cream for it, went to the chemist, offered to show him my scabby arm, but strangely he refused, but he recommended some cream which I am now applying to the scabby arm, must try and not scratch it, even though it is dead itchy.

It says on the tube to go and see a doctor if it doesn't heal in a week, that would involve actually registering with a new doctor, which is something I haven't got around to since i moved here in 1997!

Let's hope the scabby arm improves and i can put off registering with a new doctor for a few more years.

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 22:11:46 GMT

I finished another nanowrimo, 50,000 words in 30 days, was a real struggle this time, at the half way point I still needed 38,000 words, but I knuckled down and did it. Four years in a row I've done it, not done a thing with those 200,000 words yet. One day I'll get back to it.

I'm more embedded in my job, and find myself being pissed off by two pensioners, and really guilty about it. The two of them just annoy me, they are connected to my work place and I see them often, and something about them is just plain mean spirited, despite their pretend friendliness, the room seems to grow colder with them in it. Luckily I haven't been in a room with both of them in it yet, that would be freezing.

Merry Christmas the odd reader.

where did all the years go?

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 23:48:22 GMT

I started this blog in April 2005, over 3 years ago, I don't post on it every day, but rarely go a month without posting. There are some periods of obsessive posting, followed by more fallow periods. I haver no idea why I do it to be honest, it's a habit, is the best I can come up with.

Ding Dong the wicked witch has gone!

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 09:44:48 GMT

3 weeks into my new job, settling in, less of the politics of larger places I have worked. I still don't know what I'm doing, but feel less confused.

I heard from people at my old job, the evil manager has been let go, she was a temp so it would have been an easy process to let her go, pity they didn't do this in January, a whole lot of hassle could have been avoided. She is off the gravy train, and I hope (and I'm usually a generous soul) that she doesn't get another job, partly because of the way she is likely to treat staff at another organisation, mostly because I'd like her to suffer in some way - payback.

I feel bad that I feel that way

but not too bad

quick work not

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 09:04:14 GMT

had an email from my old employer, after criticizing the management when I left, I sent the form about 2 months ago, and now they are inviting me in to discuss my issues. I told them I couldn't go in as I had just started a new job, and that I was sure that the director was aware of the issues and should be able to make an informed decision on the basis of not just my comments but several others - talk talk talk, but no action, sums up the place to be honest, I'm well out of there.

back in the land of employment

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 13:25:13 GMT

Quite relieved to be honest, started a new job on Monday at a Housing Co-op in West Hampstead. Bit of a dramatic change from my last job at evil massive housing association, they told me at the interview that they are a bit tame, I said I love tame.

So I was out of work from June 27th, paid until July 27th, and wageless until September 15, I could have temped from June, instead I decided to hold out until I got a permanent job, and dug into my savings a little, before the credit crunch stole them.

Talking of the credit crunch, they way I understand it, short selling was a major factor, brokers sell stock they don't own, in the hope that the shre prices drop, then trouser the difference when the stock tanks, I think the practice is actually called "naked short selling" since you don't actually own the stock you are trading. I read somewhere that some hedgefunds who favour this practice had made billions out of it, making hay while banks went out of business, immoral really, since it is not just the big earners at banks who suffer, and frankly they get no sympathy from most, but also the support staff, and businesses who supply services, they are the real victims. Bank staff with the big bonuses can sell their 3rd homes or second porsche I guess.

Meanwhile the share price drop directly affects those with pensions, I had my pension statement recently, a stakeholder one, I have paid into for the past 6 years, it's worth what I paid in. Great, I'd have been just
as well off stuffing it under the bed.

a friend writes for the guardian

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 11:59:17 GMT

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2008/jul/19/healthandwellbeing6

he's an online mate, although i have met him a few times in real life, and a lovely chap he is as well. In saturday's guardian magazine, he wrote very movingly about how he killed a man, nothing sinister, he is a tube driver, and someone committed suicide under the train he was driving...

a life of leisure

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Sun, 06 Jul 2008 16:44:52 GMT

been a week now since i left, my main worry is whether or not i'll get paid in July, I have a feeling that the evil boss will try and stitch me up on that. She has already stitched me up on my yearly bonus. Once i officially leave the form, then i will start my complaints against her. I feel sorry for the people left, and she is really the worst manager i have ever had, and my experience of managers goes back to my first part-time job in 1978...

it has been very relaxing, not having to worry about work, next week i aim to start the job search in earnest. honest!!!

the end!

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 10:27:24 GMT

I'm out of there!! Friday was uneventful, finished most of the stuff i needed to, but impossible to finish everything - gave copious notes to my successor, nice bloke, I hope he can handle it better than i could. Evil boss barely spoke to me all day, although after i sneaked off at 4.15 (through a useful side entrance) I heard she was looking for me. I wouldn't be surprised if she turned up at my flat .

I am convinced that she will try and stop the pay for July, even though she asked me to leave and offered to pay me to the end of july, and stop the paltry bonus that she stiffed me on anyway. I did make sure HR were aware of the deal

Gawd, I feel like a surly teenager, I'm forty fucking three, and I'm so glad to be out of there. There are plenty of people i will miss, but I felt under real strain there, seeing the way she treated me and most of the other staff. Maybe i should have spoken out a bit more, but when you are in the situation, it gets difficult, I really didn't want to jeopardize the last month's pay.

So I begin again, just like 2003, when i last left a permanent job - temping awaits. Hopefully I am older and wiser now, and I'll get a perm job, and settle into it again. Sadly I thought I was all sorted in the last one, and up until Feb, i was. Then evil boss comes a calling, mass exodus, voluntary and involuntary, and stress, and anxiety. It's just not worth it. I have savings, I can survive for a few months (even if she stiffs me) and i feel relaxed for the first time since Feb.

Lucky I went gray early, or this experience would have sent me grey.

more changes

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 15:46:37 GMT

now i have only 5 working days left, my manager asked if i wanted to leave earlier - told me they'd pay me til the end of july - i said yes, so suddenly I'm leaving in a week.

blimey - how it did all end like this? i guess they didn't want me hanging about infecting people with my leave-iness.

I can take a bit of time off now, so there may be some lazy days in the pub before the job search starts in august

i want sun this july !!!

it's done

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 12:39:11 GMT

resigned today, i have about 6 weeks left in this job, sad that it had to end this way, sad that i don't actually have a job to go to, but relieved that i don't have to put up with their shite management anymore (after july anyway)

other non blog stuff is making me sad too, but that's not for here

still there

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Sat, 31 May 2008 21:36:37 GMT

still in the same job, but frankly i don't think i can take much more. Other stuff has been happening outside work, but that's not for internet consumption. My new manager is the most incompetent manager i have ever had, and my first full-time job was in 1983, hell i'll even go back to my first part-time job in 1978, she trumps all of the dozens of managers i have worked for since.

i find it grating that a woman earning what i estimate to be £50,000 a year, can not write a clearly worded email, I know, it sounds stupid, why should it bother me, it's unprofessional, and maybe i expect too much, but i do expect someone to know the difference between the word "please" and the word "police", and i don't think she's dyslexic, i think she writes words the way she hears them.

she is also a bully, but i haven't really felt bullied yet, although she has completely fucked up my job, it's the other stuff she has got away with to date. I can't believe she has only been there since Feb. She has suspended a well-liked manager (you don't hear those words too often) he was suspended for minor stuff, seems to be a vendetta on her part, after 8 weeks of very little action, he resigned, she and her boss had not made any decision. They had contacted myself and another worker and told us we were "implicated in a gross misconduct case" now that sounds like we were being accused of gross misconduct. What we were questioned about wasn't even gross misconduct. She was clearly attempting to intimidate us.

She has bullied other staff, and to my shame I have not done much about that, other than taking a grievance against her, which had no affect as she has the support of the director. One member of staff has gone off on long tern sick due to stress, another two resigned. That makes 3 resignations if you count my manager, none of them resigned because they had a job to go to. Another worker left for another job, I know he wouldn't have left had she not started work in the office. Another member of staff is off sick, I think she had a fall. The whole office mood is affected by this woman, when she is away, it is as if a massive weight has been taken off the whole office.

I nearly resigned on friday, I was all ready to confront her as cumulatively this has taken a toll, i was awake until 4am tossing and turning, worrying about my job. I decided i couldn't take it any more, I went in, expecting to have a peter finch "network" moment, when i totally lost it, and told her what was what. I was all keyed up to do this, but when i arrived, she was at a meeting, I fucked off home, telling a manager to tell her that i had fucked off.

Other stuff comes to mind, it's bonus time, and I hear she is going to agree to really small bonuses for everyone, one lady is going to get 1%, normally we get awarded 4-6%, 1% is an insult to be honest. The 1% lady, will also be discliplined, the manager is getting another manager to do the dirty work, tell people the size of the pitiful bonuses, and then instigate the disciplinary action against the 1% lady, and has threatened the same manager with a disciplinary if she refuses.

All in all, I now just want to go in on Monday and tell her what i really think of her, a colleague keeps telling me to keep calm, but to be honest I don't care any more. This woman, with the support of the director of housing, is making people miserable, is stressing people out, and for what. They seem to think that in the next inspection, we will get a glowing report. Fat fucking chance, the place is a mismanaged mess, full of unmotivated staff, and staff who will be telling the inspectors all about it when they come a calling.

Who knew about blogs in 1985?

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 13:59:34 GMT

Yes, 1985, in clearing some stuff out, I found an earlier version of blogging, a diary, handwritten from 1985 when i was 19/20. Thought I'd put a few entries up, i'll edit names out to protect the innocent!!

fairly boring stuff,the time i got up, whether i made it to a lecture, i remember university being a lot more exciting!! Although I do seem very obsessed with women, constantly trying and failing to understand them - some things never change. I was on so little money - i'd take out a fiver at a time from the cash point, and that would often fund an evening's drinking - couldn't get two pints now from a fiver.

MARCH 11 1985.

"felt pissed off this morning bit it passed, had a chat with Lloyd, he's still pissed off with K, yet his boot came the same time as mine, it made me realise how well I have in fact handled this whole affair rather well. Good Lad!. Saw J for the first time in nearly a week, the crush is definitely over and no damage is done. I might well be falling for S, but it is a similar position to the one i was in with J.

The solution is of course, Miss X, saw her in college today, I have to do something about this, hopefully by the end of term. All i need is her name and my cockiness will do the rest - hopefully.

Saw her again at tea, shit, I need something to happen, now!! Stayed in again, watched Clint in "thunderbolt and lightfoot" - good stuff - bed 1ish (papered Mitch's car - good crack - he took it well!)"

A taste of my life 23 years ago, no idea who Miss X was, I definitely wasn't cocky then, i was usually painfully shy, I seemed to be jumping from obsessions on an hourly basis, obsessing about different girls - must have been sex starvation - i wasn't having regular sex then, it must have been screwing with my mind!!!

good morning!

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 08:49:47 GMT

I feel slightly less depressed about the situation, although not particularly looking forward to going to work in a few minutes. Getting dressed would be a good start. I'm in a good position if i do decide to resign, i have savings which would last a few months if it came to it, my mortgage is low, i have a partner who would support me if the time came. Work phone is ringing, do they really expect me to answer at 8.45am, when i don't start til 9.30? It was a colleague, probably phoning in sick, can't say i blame them to be honest. If you want a motivated staff, senior management need to motivate, and if they are asking staff to consider resigning, suspending others, sending snotty emails (i got one on the blackberry yesterday) then motivation and enthusiasm tends to suffer.

work place woe

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 23:30:56 GMT

i can see myself handing in my resignation soon, when i can't find any joy in a place, it's time to head. I say joy, there are plenty of people there that i like, but the management of the place is shambolic. Plans to drug test some employees, maybe they should start drug testing the senior management first, and "cascade" the policy down. Now my manager has mysteriously gone on "emergency leave" which probably means suspension. Since the new manager started, 2 people have resigned, one manager has been asked to consider leaving, another seems to be suspended, it's all gone pear shaped within a month.

If i do resign, i know i can get temping work fairly easy, there is a slight worry about leaving a permanent job for the temping lark, but i've done it before, and things worked out then, i'm sure they'll work out again.

watch this space

workplace rant

mj_togher@hotmail.com — Sat, 08 Mar 2008 16:04:54 GMT

I've never been particularly ambitious, to be honest i can be fairly lazy at work, and management? I have had a taste of it, I'm a deputy manager where i work, but i don't particularly care if i do become a manager. Part of the reason is the way manager's treat staff. I have worked with good managers, in fact one has just left my organisation after deciding that she could not work with the director. I can't say i blame her after hearing of her latest antic. One of the manager's in my office as worked for the organisation for almost 20 years, in my view she is a good manager, manages her staff well, is fair, I'm sure she can be firm if necessary, but i've never heard a word of complaint about her. However, she seems to be at war with the director, they simply don't like eachother, probably because she isn't a yes-person, and yes-people are what this director likes. She seems to specialise in promoting her favourites, she recently replaced our recently departed manager, with a woman who clearly does not have the personal or professional skills to manage. My theory, she wanted to piss off one or both of the managers in this office. Probably a power thing. I thought it was a slap in the face to both of them, who should have been considered for the acting up post, but weren't.

enough of the fuckwit who now manages the office, now i hear that the director has instructed HR, to persuade a manager to leave, because she is "an obstacle to change", basically the director doesn't like her, and wants her out. I can't believe she was able to brow-beat personnel into suggesting this to the said manager, although it was a one on one conversation, so there are no witnesses (i believe it did happen though)

She doesn't want to go, particularly as they appear only willing to offer her 3 months pay, if the fuckwits who run this department really want her to leave, they need to offer her big big money, and she is likely to take it. Alas it will surely lead to a lot of good people leaving the organisation, and the chances of the organisation receiving 3 stars in the next inspection, are surely nil]

why are bosses such fuckwits? i doubt we'll ever get an answer to that